The Problem with New Year’s Resolutions…and goal-setting in general

The new year is about one month old now, and I want to ask you two questions:

1. Did you set any resolutions or vow to stick to new habits back on January 1st?
2. Are you still following them regularly and consistently right now?

If you’ve answered Yes and then No, don’t feel (too) bad: research suggests that a whooping 65% of all New Year’s Resolutions don’t make it past Easter, and 1 out of 10 will already have given up and gone back to their past behaviors and routines after just one month!

So why is that, and what can you do to avoid joining that sad statistic?

It turns out the issue isn’t necessarily your (lack of) willpower or discipline or determination, and rather rooted in a failure of proper planning. What do I mean by that?

🍕Perhaps your resolution was to go for a low carb diet, but suddenly you found yourself on a business trip to Italy, surrounded by enticing pizza and pasta 24/7.

👩‍🍼 Maybe you thought you would wake up at 5am every morning and head out for a run or a workout, 5 days a week…but your young child hadn’t read the memo about your expectation for 8 hours of undisturbed sleep each night.

In both these instances, you can of course blame yourself for lacking the willpower to say “no, grazie” to all the 🍕, or not being disciplined enough to hit the gym in spite of sleeping only 4 hours, but that won’t do anyone any good.

Because the issue isn’t in your intentions, but rather in your failure to anticipate the typical obstacles that life always finds a way of throwing in your path (and having a plan to work around them).
Put differently, as Helmuth von Moltke said it, “no plan survives first contact with the enemy.” And unfortunately in this instance, the enemy is none other than “real life” itself!

Life has the uncanny ability to throw lots of unexpected punches. Some hits catch you off guard, but many of life's challenges are actually foreseeable, either through past experiences or by some advanced planning.

So as you look at your (perhaps already abandoned) New Year’s resolutions again, consider rethinking them and starting at the end: anticipate what obstacles (pizza, crying babies, late nights in the office, etc) might pop up that would derail you from the “optimal” path. Take the time to think these through, plan when and how they might hit you, and prepare so that these hits don't sting as much or at all.

When setting your goals or resolutions, extend your vision beyond the initial enthusiasm. Fast forward 3, 6, or 12 months and ask yourself: How might this go wrong? This isn't meant to discourage you; quite the opposite. Planning for potential setbacks reduces the likelihood of falling short. Instead of crafting plans solely for ideal scenarios, create a blueprint designed for the realities of life.

Optimism is valuable, and realism is essential. Merge the two, and you position yourself to succeed despite the punches life may throw your way.